Dark Loveless Eyes
by chocolatefrogaddictt
Summary: "Look its Bellatrix Lestrange!" When Lydia Tonks leaves her front door after the breakout this is all she hears. Simply because she looks like her aunt. Slowly, she devolves from a happy, stable witch determined to fight evil to someone whos willing to negotiate with the dark side, because if you can't beat them why not join them? Read as she pulls away from her family, friends...


**Owl Results**

The England Town House the Tonkses inhabited was pretty average. For the wizarding home that is. During the school year, the lawn was consistently ridded of gnomes, the enchantments were always up to date and the house forever smelled of wonderful cooking courtesy of Andromeda Tonks. This middle aged witch was to put it simply, an intense neat freak. A trait which had not been passed to either of her daughters. Quite the opposite actually.

Andromeda was a very nurturing and loving mother but no one could deny her of the fact that while her daughters were around, her sighs were a little bit heavier at the fact that she was constantly picking up knocked over umbrella stands or cleaning spilled drinks up from the floor.

"Oh darling, please try not to make a huge mess of things," The woman exasperated after her eldest daughter knocked over the same chair for the third time. "I spent hours-"

"Honestly mum the place is too clean already." The young witch said with a grin. "Bit unnatural really."

Andromeda rolled her eyes and spoke with joking irritation. "Yes, _you_ would think so. I'd hate to see that flat of yours, must be an absolute shanty." She flicked her wrist, putting the knocked over chair back in it's proper upright position. "Speaking of your flat, if you'd just let me-"

The eldest daughter let out a loud groan, interrupting her proposal. Not a second later, she heard her husband call from the kitchen pleasantly. "Give it a rest 'Dromeda, the girl's barely walked through the door for Merlin's sake." Edward, more commonly known as Ted, Tonks was more than used to hearing the two women clash opinions on such trivial things and he was determined to try and keep the peace for today. They hadn't seen her in weeks.

At the sound of his voice, Andromeda's expression softened. She really was happy to see her daughter. Since she'd moved out and completed her auror training over a year ago, their time together had been thinning dramatically. "Yes, yes you're right of course. But Nymphadora do try-"

Nymphadora, not at all used to be called that name aside from her mother (She often referred to it as being 'Absolutely horrid') turned slightly pink in the face and shuddered. "Mum would you please not-"

Andromeda was standing up once again now an exasperated look on her face. "Listen darling," She started, making the young woman roll her eyes at the familiar spiel she was about to tell. "We've had this discussion on numerous occasions. That's the name I decided to give you and I personally find it quite lovely-"

The girl snorted. "Revolting is what it is."

Andromeda rolled her eyes, but refrained from becoming too annoyed once remembering how short their visits together were. "Fine then. If it really bothers you that much, I'll avoid calling you that for sanity's sake." She mumbled her last couple words whilst making an agitated face at the floor.

The girl rolled her eyes at her mother but got up and hugged her all the same. "Thank you mum." She crooned whilst pulling her into the other room, nearly knocking over yet another chair.

Andromeda was wearing her usual emerald green robes with her dark hair piled on top of her head in a messy bun. As she followed her daughter into the other room, sighing as a small knock on a picture frame caused it to wobble, she kept her shoulders back and eyes high. Since she'd been little the teachings of perfect posture had stuck with her.

"So," Nymphadora, who was ordinarily referred to as Tonks exclaimed. "Where's Lyd?" She was now lying comfortably on the family's living room couch, her fingers running through her 'violently violet' pixie cut. The family was more than used to Tonks' impulsive hair decisions, ranging between all colours of the rainbow and every length at random.

Andromeda chuckled. "She's upstairs writing to some friends of hers I believe. Quite secretive about them if we're being honest. We've met the Weasley twins on a couple occasions and before they went to stay with the Order she'd floo over there quite frequently, but we really don't know much else." Andromeda paused, debating whether or not she should admit her fears to the elder daughter. "I think she may be lonely here with just us." She caved, her voice clear with sadness, but also understanding. When she'd been young, loneliness had been a common factor in her life.

Tonks nodded uncomfortably. She'd received a few letters from her sister recently, asking questions about her own mischievous Hogwarts days but most notably so, requests for her to go join the Weasley children who were staying at the headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix.

Tonks herself had no real issue with Lydia staying there, she was sure Mrs Weasley would take tremendous care of her once she got to know her, the only problem was convincing her parents to allow her to go in the first place. Judging from her mother's clear anguish on the subject, she was pretty certain that convincing them wouldn't come without saddening them as well.

"Yeah, Lyd's quite the charmer. She's got a good mix going actually. Those Weasley twins come from Gryffindor and then she has a couple from Slytherin, and then there's a scattered few from Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff." Tonks smiled at her mother, trying to cover up her discomfort about what she may have to convince her into later on. "The best of course come from Hufflepuff." She said proudly, referring to the Hogwarts house she'd graduated from.

"Right you are 'Dora!" They heard Tonks' father call once again from the kitchen. He'd also been a Hufflepuff back in his Hogwarts days, Andromeda being a Slytherin like Lydia. His words were soon followed by a bang that warranted a loud sigh from Andromeda. He was where the girls had inherited the clumsy gene.

Mrs. Tonks however ignored the bang and instead beamed with pride upon hearing her daughter's words. Herself and her husband had always tried to establish the mindset that there are good and bad people everywhere and the sorting hat's decision had no rule on the matter. The fact that Lydia had embraced this teaching made her heart swell. Based on her own time in the house, she also knew how persuasive the nastier Slytherins could be. The stereotype that all Slytherins were 'evil' was unjustified and untrue. There were plenty of Slytherins who followed proper beliefs, they just tended to be less loud about it. The fact that like her she'd stood her ground and branched out, made her even prouder.

"She does have quite a few friends doesn't she?" The dark haired witch chuckled. "What about Melinda Bobbin?" She continued curiously a moment later. "The two of them were quite good friends in years past if I remember properly."

Tonks smiled once again. "Yeah, as far as I understand it, her and Melinda are still rather close. I believe she's on holiday though, so the two hav-"

An excited call came from the stairs cutting Tonks short. "They just arrived!"

"What did dear?" Called out Mr. Tonks at the sound of his youngest daughter's voice.

"The O.W.L. results I presume." answered Tonks, a look of excitement on her face that was matched almost immediately by both her parents.

A few seconds later a raven haired girl was standing on the landing looking at a piece of paper with her brows furrowed. The family quickly trickled into the area where the end of the staircase lay, not saying a word while she contemplated the results.

ORDINARY WIZARDING LEVEL RESULTS

Pass Grades: Outstanding (O) Fail Grades: Poor (P)

Exceeds Expectations (E) Dreadful (D)

Acceptable (A) Troll (T)

LYDIA CEDRELLA TONKS HAS ACHIEVED:

Ancient Runes: E

Astronomy: D

Arithmancy: O

Charms: E

Defence Against the Dark Arts: O

Herbology: A

History of Magic: O

Potions: E

Transfiguration: O

She allowed herself to break out into a smile once she got a good look at the list. She'd done rather well in all the subjects she'd been hoping too. She nearly burst out laughing once she regarded her Astronomy mark. This had been expected since the day of the exam had been spent entirely as a day of product testing with Fred and George ('Fainting Fancies' had still had a lot of malfunctions to work through, leaving her with an intolerable fatigue for the entire day.), not to mention not knowing the difference between Cassiopeia and Lepus the Hare for the life of her. She was proud though to hand the list over to her mother. She'd achieved more O.W.L.s than Fred and George had had combined and come very close to achieving the same level of excellence Tonks had accomplished back when she'd taken her O.W.L.s. Tonks was surprisingly very gifted in the area of standardized testing.

When she looked up to hand the list over to the awaiting Andromeda, she caught the first sight of Tonks' violet hair. "Dora!" she cried so loudly it was nearly a shout. She pushed her way in between her now beaming parents to give her sister a hug.

Tonks smiled at the nickname both Lydia and their father had penned for her after she'd addressed her concerns with her full name. "Took you long enough to notice me." Tonks teased, looking up slightly at her younger sister who was at least an inch taller than her at 5"7.

Slowly though, Lydia watched her face contort, her nose wiggle, and then, like a weed Tonks sprouted upwards another inch and a half making her ever so slightly taller.

"That's better." She sighed cracking her back from where she now stood.

Lydia rolled her eyes in silent envy of her sister's powers. Tonks was a Metamorphmagus, which meant she had the capability to alter her appearance at will without the consumption of any potion or use of any spell. It was a rare magical quality that unfortunately, had not been passed down to Lydia much to her dismay.

"I can't have my little sister being taller than me." She said with a laugh.

The two looked back at their mother who was now studying the sheet, clearly very proud. "This is a wonderful job darling, sincerely." She handed the sheet over to her husband and continued beaming at both her daughters. "Nym-"

Tonks gave her a mother a look that caused her to rethink her wording as Lydia chortled at how much her sister disliked it. (She could admit though that it wasn't a very endearing name.)

"Urh, um, yes well darling," She started again resulting in nods of approval as well as a scattered chuckle. "Did you somehow know the O.W.L.s were coming today? It's so odd that you would've chosen this particular day for your first visit in well, now Ted, it's been what? A month now?"

"That'd be correct Andromeda." He said partially teasing Tonks for her lack of visits.

"Oh come on now, it has _not_ been that long!" She protested in response.

"'fraid it has been." Lydia added with a poke at Tonks' rib.

Tonks rolled her eyes. "Being an auror is a rather demanding job you know! Besides with all these new developments involving the Order and He-Who-Must-Be-Named's return to power and the madness the ministry has become, I mean you wouldn't believe the sort of things they're trying over there…" She trailed off realizing that by mentioning Voldemort she had rather sobered up the tone of the room. "But yes, I may have overheard something regarded O.W.L. results." She added slowly, trying to reimburse the previous mood of the room.

The Tonks family were all strong supporters of the Order of the Phoenix and were well aware of Voldemort's rise. Andromeda and Ted were not ones to censor information from their children and had had the appropriate discussions with both of them whenever it became necessary, as well as allowed them room and time to form their own opinions on the matters. This was something Andromeda had never experienced when she was young, so establishing that kind of bond with her family was important to her. However, talking about the possibility of war and havoc as plainly as she had just done caused the usual lightheartedness of the household to suddenly become very heavy and somber.

Ted broke the silence by offering his youngest daughter some well deserved praise. "Marvellous job dear," He exclaimed whilst wrapping his arms around her shoulders and squeezing. "Couldn't be prouder." He added with a wink, handing the paper over to her.

Mr Tonks was a friendly, caring man who had fair hair and carried all his weight right around the middle. He always said he felt incredibly lucky to have been given the life he had and as such he was one of the happiest men most had ever met. It was a running joke in the family that he was the "luckiest man alive", something his daughters had no problem teasing him about. Lydia had a very close relationship with both her parents but there was something special between her and her dad. He always accepted her regardless what she did, while it seemed as if Andromeda held her to a higher standard than was sometimes impossible to reach.

"Dad you have a little-" Lydia pointed to her father's chin where there were spots of porridge and then again on his shirt where there was a small greasy looking stain.

He looked down and smiled. "Oh yes of course dear." Then he left the room to clean himself up. Caring as he may be, Ted Tonks was a bit of a slob.

"Am _I_ allowed to see?" Tonks asked enthusiastically referring to the page of results Lydia was holding while wriggling both of her eyebrows maniacally.

Lydia made a face as if considering it, while keeping it hidden behind her back. "Hmm… Perhaps.." She leaned in closer to her sister, making sure that their mum who was now preoccupied with cleaning up some crumbs that her husband left behind, wouldn't hear. "If you follow through on what we _discussed_…" She sung the last part making Tonks burst out into laughter.

"Look Lyd, I will try my best okay?" She assured her, now slumping across the worn couch again. "I mean Sirius and Dumbledore and everyone is okay with it, it's just down to mum and dad."

"Ahhh I know, thank you for getting me this far at least." Lydia declared. When Tonks had sent her the letter saying the two of them had given her a green light, she'd nearly squealed from excitement. It mustn't have been easy to convince them of that and she was very grateful they'd gotten this far. "And, by doing so you have earned the right to view my O.W.L. results." She handed the page over and waited patiently while she perused it.

She chuckled noticing Lydia's full name at the top. "Cedrella…" She stated, referring to Lydia's middle name. "Mum really isn't great at picking out names is she?"

"Hey," Lydia vexed in return. "Much better than _Nymphadora_! At least my name has relation to a respected relative."

"True, true." She said, relenting her badgering but the smirk never left her lips. "Huh, great job Lyd." She praised once she finished reading the sheet.

"Always the tone of surprise." Lydia teased whilst twisting her already curly hair tighter around her finger.

"Merlin, look how long your hair has gotten!" She took a handful of the long curly black strands than regarded her sister closely. "And your skin... Blimey, you really do look just like mum."

Lydia shrugged biting her lip slightly now. "I guess that's what I got in place of the Metamorphmagus gene."

"So, how are things with the Order dear?" asked her father a quarter of an hour later when they were all having tea.

"Oh good!" Tonks responded while helping herself to more of the mashed potatos her mother had out. "Can't say too much with the confidentiality and all other than what I've already told you, but last night, myself and Remus and a few other members went to pick up the Potter boy."

Lydia grinned down at her plate at the word Remus. The way her sister said it, much peppier than the rest of her words and the instant light that came over her eyes. It didn't take much for Lydia to figure out that Tonks fancied him, even if she wouldn't admit it yet. But then her grin faltered. "You mean you guys got Harry Potter up there too?" She asked enviously. The whole summer she'd been stuck there with her mum and dad while a large quantity of her friends and even kids in younger years were in the creative midst of the Order.

Through the few letters her and the twins had been sending each other she'd gathered the basics of who was up with them but they really weren't allowed to share much information. Most of what she did know was delivered through a genius code method they'd conducted together. It had been their idea to suggest to Tonks about Lydia coming to stay with them.

Tonks nodded in response to Lydia's question. "Just arrived last night. Poor bloke, you should've seen the muggles he was living with! Horrid ones, not like how you described your parents to be at all dad." She stopped for a second to shovel a forkful of potatoes into her mouth and swallow fast. "And with his trial and all? Not fair that is, the Ministry should've listened to Dumbledore months ago and gotten rid of the Dementors before something like this happened. Of course the ministry's gone to shite now so nothing could've really been done there." Tonks took a breath to take a drink of the pumpkin juice laid out in front of her, nearly thumping the goblet to the floor.

Lydia dropped her fork, eyes wide upon hearing this story. "What trial? Why were there Dementors-"

Tonks raised her eyebrows clearly surprised that Lydia didn't know. She then proceeded to explain how Harry had been attacked by Dementors and used magic resulting in a possibility of expulsion from Hogwarts. Lydia's jaw nearly dropped. Her and Harry had probably exchanged two words since he'd started at Hogwarts, but hearing this still angered her immensely. Harry had been the one who'd given Fred and George the money for them to start the joke shop up.

"Bu- But they can't do that! He had every right to use magic it was self defense-"

"We know Lyd, but the Ministry refuses to admit that the Dementors were even there." Tonks said sympathetically.

"You know I hate being out of the loop of all this." Lydia announced crossley. Despite the code they'd conducted, there was still so much she couldn't know. Tonks had explained briefly the last time she was here that it was all in Dumbledore's orders not to say anything that could be intercepted but even so, it hurt Lydia that after all the years of rule breaking they still abided Dumbledore. Deep down though, she knew it wasn't fair to blame them. Dumbledore was one of the few respectable wizards left and had she been in the same position, she'd have done the same. "I just wished I was up there with all of them." She added, now whining ever so slightly, trying to get her parent's attention.

Mr and Mrs Tonks stopped talking at the sound of these words and began looking at each other, worried looks on their faces. They'd been very against the idea of Lydia being anywhere near the Order, regardless of the fact she was almost of age. They seemed to still view her as a scared little girl, only eleven years old about to start her first year at Hogwarts. Forget the fact that she was sixteen.

"Well darling," Andromeda started slowly, whilst putting some more peas on her plate. "You know that isn't exactly our decision, I mean Dumbledore-"

Lydia looked at Tonks, nodding her on. "Well, uh mum," She interrupted, looking down at her own plate, not able to look her in the eyes. "Speaking on the subject of that, Dumbledore has agreed to let her come and stay at Headquarters with the Weasley's, I mean it'll be a perfe-"

"I don't think so." Andromeda stated as she stood up and waved her plate clean, despite the peas she'd just put on it.

"What? Why?" Demanded Lydia as her heart sunk to the pit of her stomach.

"I mean well, how does Sirius feel about this? It is his house is it not?" She continued, now standing over by the kitchen sink.

The family was all well aware of Sirius Black's innocence and his escape from Azkaban, the wizarding prison, from a couple years prior. During his entire time in there, Andromeda had instilled to her family that he wasn't guilty and that it was a vast mistake on the Ministry's part. Sirius, being Andromeda's first cousin and one of the few who respected her marriage to Ted, was the last of the Black family whom she still cared for.

"Sirius is fine with it. In fact, I think he's rather excited to meet her. He still refers to you as his favourite cousin." Tonks encouraged, now attempting to help with the clean up but only resulting in a trail of peas across the tiles.

Andromeda ignored this, just waving her hand in the air, not even watching as they all disappeared. She was smiling slightly now, no doubt about Tonks' favourite cousin remark. Still though, she wasn't convinced Lydia should go stay with them. "Well, don't you think it's an awfully dangerous place for a young girl to-"

"Oh get off it mum!" Lydia cried out a little too crossly. Her face flushed, now a little embarrassed. "I'll be of age in November anyway I think I'll be okay. Besides everyone is there it's not as if-"

Andromeda shook her head. Tonks looked uncomfortable as if unsure whether to step in or not. Finally she said, "Mum she'll be perfectly safe, there's only a month until she'll be back at school anyway."

The eldest witch hesitated now clearly considering it. Lydia's heart jumped. "Oh please mum, please. Dad what do you-"

"Yes Ted what do you think?" asked his wife using an entirely different tone than Lydia.

"Er..." He said considering, eyes flickering between the three women. He'd kept quiet, not wanting to interrupt, but he personally had no problem with Lydia staying with the Weasley's. He remembered Arthur and Molly from school and had never had a problem with them. He also remembered young Sirius and how happy Andromeda had been when he'd run away, but also worried for his safety. He'd even come and stayed with them for a short while. He knew the real reason his wife wasn't giving in, wasn't a matter of security, she'd always believed that their children should fight for what they believe in even if it was a little dangerous. Her real problem with it was loneliness. Soon Lydia would be finished at Hogwarts and soon after that moving out. She wasn't prepared for all of that yet. "Well 'Dromeda she'll be well protected" He answered quietly staring at his hands. "Molly and Arthur are good people as is Sirius and Dumbledore and all the other Order heavy weights that will be there consistently."

"Yes, yes he's right and it'll be much better than her being locked up here all summer. This way she can see her friends and get involved without being on any missions or invited to meetings or anything. Besides there are that many enchantments on Headquarters-"

"Oh all right." She said relenting. She knew that her protests were for purely selfish reasons and it wasn't fair of Lydia to have to miss out because of it. "If your friends are there, and everything's safe." Decided Andromeda, causing Lydia to squeak a little.

"Thank you, thank you mum." She stood up to give her mother a hug.

Andromeda smiled. "Yes well, Nymphadora-" Tonks shuddered but her mum continued as if she hadn't noticed. "Please make sure she remains safe okay?"

"Oh, mum I'll be fine." Lydia said with a grin. "This is brilliant I'm going to go pack."

"I'll come with you." Stated Tonks hurriedly clearly not interested in a safety lecture from her mother.

When they entered Lydia's room, she let out a big sigh realizing packing would take her ages. Being the disorganized girl that she was, her things were scattered all over the house and without permission to use magic.. Her thoughts were interrupted though when Tonks took out her wand. With one swift wave, a mess of things came sprawling from all directions before landing straight the truck.

"Damn that's quite messy isn't it?" Tonks said after looking at her handiwork. Truth be told it was incredibly messy, however Lydia couldn't care less. She was going to join the Order. Tonks however was preoccupied with trying to get all the clothing articles perfect, the way their mum used to do when they went on holiday. "You should ask mum to fix it, she can do that thing with the socks." Tonks waved her wand once again attempting to put the socks in pairs but they only wiggled slightly.

She sighed and sat on the bed entertaining herself as she tried over and over again to make the socks fold. Lydia however, was distracted. She walked over to her desk where the stack of unsent letters to her friends lay. She'd sent her responses to Melinda Bobbin, her best friend from Slytherin who was away vacationing in France just before the O.W.L.s had come, but she hadn't had any time to send the others.

The extra long one, addressed to Fred and George, was filled to the brim with ideas on new products to start trying for their joke shop, _Weasley's Wizard Wheezes_. The parchment was so full of ink the corners were starting to roll and smudge a little. Under that, was one addressed to Lee Jordan, also on holiday but this time in America, who in his previous letter had gone absolutely mad about how the really wealthy wizards over there had something entitled the "_Wizarding Web_" as opposed to Owl Post. Lydia had written to tell him he had clearly inhaled too much dungbomb smoke before leaving because the idea of it alone, sounded absolutely bonkers. Finally though, there was short letter she hadn't finished to a boy named Roy Blackery, whom she'd gone to the yule ball with. Roy had sent her three letters during the month and a bit that Hogwarts had been out and she hadn't responded to one. She wasn't quite sure what to say.

"You ready now?" Asked Tonks who had clearly given up on the socks.

Lydia nodded shoving the stack of letters in her sweater pocket. "I have some more stuff downstairs."

The two of them carried the trunk downstairs and Lydia saw her mother's face contort in disgust at the job they'd done before relaxing into a chuckle. "I figured as much." She said and with a wave of her wand the rest of Lydia's things flew into the trunk and to Tonk's dismay all her socks folded perfectly.

"How do you do that?" Tonks asked curiously while pointing at the socks.

Andromeda smiled. "Just a flick of the wrist."

Tonks rolled her eyes and grabbed Lydia's bags motioning the way. "You're going to love it."

**A/N: So basically I started this story about a year ago with it going in a totally different direction. Now, I've decided to reboot it with some fresh (hopefully better) ideas. If you were a fan of the story when I first published it (sorry about the sudden stopping hah) I hope you can learn to love where I plan to go with it this time. Let me know what you think! Also, if you notice any continuity or grammar errors please please let me know. I try as hard as I can to be super accurate but I am an amateur writer and constantly fact checking is very time consuming. Thanks so much for reading ahah -Kylie**


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